“I’m always amazed when people learn how anti-ceremony I can be…”
What can I say? I can’t stand ceremonial stuff. Specifically, I can’t stand recognition ceremonies, and I also don’t see the point of big to-dos marking the beginning or end of things. Most current in my family’s mind is trying to get me to “walk” at JMU’s commencement. I have not only said that no, I’m not walking, but have backed it up by making sure I have a shift at work that happens during that blasted ceremony. Why am I so anti-ceremony? Well, I find that they’re a waste of time and money, for one thing. For graduation, you have to buy the cap and gown, buy the invitations, mail the invitations, spend the money in gas to go back and forth, and spend all that time sitting there listening to a speaker tell me how I have my whole life ahead of me, this is the end of a college career, and a new beginning, and blah blah blah. I’m a man who likes to enter and exit quietly, believe it or not. Take note, though, that there is a difference between “public recognition” and “tooting my own horn”, the latter of which I quite enjoy doing. The former, I just want to bolt, as in the case of a “senior roast” that a group I participate in did for me. They were well-intentioned, but I just wanted to curl up and die, because I so hate being thrust into the center of attention, vs. putting myself there. I was being polite, though, and didn’t up and leave, despite wanting to. Basically, when I get public recognition, I want nothing more than to just hide, but when I toot my own horn, everyone else runs and hides. And yes, the latter is preferable. Let me toot my own horn and exit quietly, same as I came in. Similarly, though, I know that I will be a hard one to get into a marriage. For one thing, I want nothing to do with a ceremony, which is a tremendous expenditure (I’ve become a bit of a cheapskate in the last few years), plus requires all the to-do of getting people together, and all this show and dance, and besides, half of all weddings end in divorce anyway. My ideal wedding is going up to the courthouse, and signing on the dotted line. I figure, if you love her, you love her, and you show it through what you do in your day to day interactions, not by putting on a tuxedo and spending all this money on an afternoon of entertainment for all your friends and family. As I mentioned, I like to enter and exit things quietly. I come in on the scene quietly, and then when my time is over, I want to leave quietly, just as I came in. Fairly simple. When I do well, tell me quietly, and then let me toot my own horn. I’m not for ceremony. Just do it and let it be done. And it is amazing how many people are surprised to hear me say that…
Date posted: December 9, 2003